middle-aged, washed-out, never to be cool again, but married

I recently bumped into a nearly-40 friend who is single after a long relationship that started in his early 20s. He excitedly told me that he'd been seeking advice about "looking good" and "dressing well" from one of the fitness sites he frequents. He's gotten lots of great advice and has been buying new clothes -- but carefully -- he tries to be thrifty. The change in his appearance is subtle, but noticeable, and it was clear he was feeling good about himself.

I leaned in to tell him one of my buying secrets. I typically wear the same style of pants pretty much all the time. I've taken to buying good, solid name-brand pants at K-mart of all places and mentioned that they have great prices.

With a slight tinge of pity, he patted my knee and said "Oh sweetheart, it's fine for you to look frumpy -- you're already married."