return of the googly eye

I'm becoming intimately familiar with the 4am -- 5:30 am cycle on my digital bedside clock. There will be sleep, eventually.

Juliet's tumor seems to have grown even more. She has a restless mouth. She seems to chew a lot, though perhaps she's just trying to find a comfortable place to rest her tongue. And her eye isn't looking good, either. Last night, it was half closed, a little weepy, and the third lid had started to reappear, as it did right after her surgery. She's eating very little, though sometimes I think she's hungry.

And after all this, the discomfort, the medications, the daily hydration, and on and on, she still purrs when I climb into bed.

There's a lot of talk about the blood-brain barrier, and I at times think the barrier between my intellect and emotions is as strong. Tonight, really this morning, I had a breakthrough. I laid in bed with the kitty and gently stroked her. She purred. I cried.

Perhaps there's more sleep in me now before another day of work. I'll try, at least.