A pattern language for living

We spent an incredibly relaxing weekend filled with visits to friends in lovely places. It was made great by the absence of pressure to maintain the lawn, run errands, do, do, do, and go, go, go. These are all things I can do during the week now, so that the weekend truly can feel more like a tiny vacation.

I'm sitting in my new study, light and air coming in on both sides, the cat sleeping at my feet in a special nest I've made her.

A friend who was out of work for more than two years, not a situation of her choosing, recently got a job. It's a "permanent job" as opposed to a contract job, but not permanent in the sense that it supports her in the style to which she's become accustomed or that as the current description runs, she will derive long-term satisfaction from it.

I wrote to her just now about seeing her current job in architectural terms. It's as if she's started to climb a staircase and she's arrived at a "resting spot." From that vantage point, she can get a much better view of the landscape around her and plot her next move.

This was all in reference to "A Pattern Language," a book of architectural concepts that I first browsed through in 1978. Its metaphor has since been adopted by the computer industry. It's now common to start programming tasks by working with patterns or "templates."

This morning, I found excerpts of the book online and started browsing (of course, it and some of the author's later books instantly went on my amazon list.) I'd forgotten how funny, wise, and well-written it is. (For snippets, see: http://downlode.org/etext/patterns/)

I'd also forgotten that each pattern is set up as an explication of Conflict and Resolution. And that many of the Conflicts apply more generally to life than one might realize on first reading. Or perhaps that shouldn't be a surprise -- "A Pattern Language" talks a lot about how to integrate architecture into our lives so that we can live effectively as individuals and community members.

Some marvelous examples:

> Conflict: There is no substitute for fire.

Yes, fire in the house is important. We (humans and animals) are naturally drawn to it -- Robert and I call it "kitty tv." But what about fire in the belly? The juice that keeps me going, that engages me, is passion about my life, my work, my relationships.

> Conflict: A staircase is not just a way of getting from one floor to another. The stair is itself a space, a volume, a part of the building; and unless this space is made to live, it will be a dead spot, and work to disconnect the building and to tear its processes apart.

Or, it's not the destination but the path that you take. Each step is important. My friend in the "temporary permanent" job can consider using this interim time to her own advantage. The steps on the staircase and in the interim parts of our lives are as much a part of the experience as are the experiences that we yearn for. Or, perhaps, they're all stepping stones. One day we're not breathing, we're born and start breathing, and during that hopefully long time of breathe-in, breathe-out, we enter a transition, and then one day we stop breathing again. And we can create and mold that transition to be boring, frustrating, exciting, fulfilling. It's up to us.

> Conflict: The layout of paths will seem right and comfortable only when it is compatible with the process of walking. And the process of walking is far more subtle than one might imagine.

Designing life goals and the means of reaching them can work only when you consider the experience of living. And the process of living can be more subtle and more complex than you might imagine.


OK, so maybe these are a stretch, but it does make me think about creating "A Pattern Language for Life" by starting with Alexander's Conflicts and writing my own Resolutions. But really, my PLfL will be different from anyone else's.

BTW, the web site I referred to is structured to encourage delightful meandering. (As I remember, I think the navigation is based on the book itself, which would have been a natural fit for a web site had the web been invented at the time of writing.)