My friend Ed died this morning, apparently at peace and surrounded by loving family. Those who've cared for him have set a high bar for the level of care we all deserve at this time in our lives. His caretakers are true heroes, every last one of them.
It's been a sad, slow day. It's raining a lot, for something like the eighth day in a row. In fact, the rain started about the time that Ed started on his final decline. I didn't do much today. I did go for a swim, but didn't speed along as much as I would have liked. I took my cat to the vet and felt cheered by the good folks there, full of hope and help and dreams and joy. The cat is next to me now, sitting under a lamp, purring her heart out. I am so grateful for her company.
I found myself moving through all sorts of emotions today. I sat for a while with my sadness about Ed and those loved ones he's left behind. Then it turned inward for a while -- it gave me access to other sadness that lives within but that doesn't get out much. I felt such disappointment for Ed, for all those dreams that he doesn't get to live out, and for Ed and Jane -- what about all their dreams? I felt pissed off for a while -- sometimes just driving in Massachusetts helps get that emotion out.
Tonight, we're seeing a favorite performer, Paul Bonin Rodriguez. I'm hoping that his latest piece will bring on both tears and laughter -- I could use a little, maybe a lot, of both.
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