life and death

Yesterday, I heard from my friend MH. M has been HIV-infected for over twenty years; he is a long-time survivor in body and spirit. He has struggled with debilitating depression and hasn't worked for nearly nine years. He went off meds a while back partly because of the horrible side effects and partly because there weren't a lot of options left.

Through all this, he's been taking jazzercise despite painful neuropathy, has started to act, has appeared in some student movies, is part of the care-team of another friend, and got a dog, which I thought was the biggest show of life-spirit yet.

Well, he's on new meds and a good anti-depressant, and he sounds fabulous. (And his numbers have finally shifted after years in the dumps.) He's about to go off to Australia for their Mardi Gras (which is celebrated later than ours). And the dog is eight or nine years old.

He just bought a newer car now that the-last-car-he-was-going-to-buy is getting a little older than we were hoping it would. And he has enough spirit and pizzazz to get even the stodgy going. You go girlfriend!!

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On the other end of life, I just read that the wife of a columnist died yesterday. Ho hum, you might say. This columnist, Donald Murray, is a little different. He's a skilled writer, so he's a pleasure to read anyways. And he writes about life, his childhood, and his relationships, facing them all head-on. So over the last fifteen to twenty years, his readers have learned a lot about his wife, Minnie Mae, and their three, now two, children. Yesterday's column was so gracious; MM had dementia, yet had refused all meds and food. But she was hanging on, just drifting for a while. He described how his daughters and he were just sitting, reveling in life, accompanying MM to the end, and that column left me feeling so very peaceful, like much is right in this world. This morning, I read that she had died. My thoughts go out to her family. The column is here, but I'm not sure how long the link will last.