screening my social calls

I've replaced some of the cardboard in the cat barrier with a grid-like screen. I then taught the cats to go up to the screen and sniff each other. That went fairly well. There was some hissing and growling in the beginning from the little guy, but that eventually subsided.

And then, they figured out that they could sniff without my intervention. That was kinda cute. They also discovered that the peepholes are not only a good size for a nose but also for a paw. And they've invented a very amusing game called "Slap me". One kitty sticks a paw through and the other slaps away. I'm assuming that claws are sheathed, because I haven't heard any crying. Then a nose might appear, then the other cat's paw, which all in turn get slapped.

Or Theo will run out of the bathroom and Koa will stick her paw through trying to punch him as he goes by, but of course he's too fast. Now Koa goes looking for him and Theo comes to the screen and cries if she's not nearby.

So I've gotten brave, and we've had a couple of meetings au naturel, without barrier. Nose meets nose, very polite. If Koa looks a little put out, I remove Theo. I have let Theo wander into the bathroom a few times, and Koa has not gotten upset. I have not let Theo wander under the bed when Koa is under there, and I try to get him to lie down when we're hanging out for a few minutes. And I also take him away fairly quickly because I'd like the experiences to be positive for all three of us. For the time being, visits will continue to be supervised closely. Theo in particular can't yet be trusted to "do the right thing" which could easily end badly.

And I've discovered that they're both eager to practice their social skills with me, rubbing my nose with theirs. I am of course charmed to be taken into their tribe.

The introductions continue, slowly but surely. Progress is being made.

what is your tissue*?

I went to the ultrasound appointment today. Bottom line -- the two lumps appear to be "nodular tissue," and did not show up on the scan. But I'm to keep an eye on them, or actually, a finger or two, and if they get bigger, have them looked at. People at the appointment -- the technician and the doctor -- were super nice, very professional, and very reassuring, all very helpful.

Thanks again to everyone who's sent good thoughts my way. I think that villages are needed not just to raise yunguns, but to sustain all of us. And I feel mightily sustained right now.


* When my nephew, Santiago, was just learning to talk, someone did something that really annoyed him. In irritation, he said, enunciating each word carefully, "What is your tissue?" I'm sure my tongue still has scars from the severe biting I did that day.

good sleeping weather

Ah, great sleeping weather last night. According to my computer, it's 51 degrees this morning. I slept under my down comforter for the first time in weeks. And it would have been a great sleep except... that I'm a single cat mommy right now. So I spent the night in true feline fashion traveling between bedrooms, visiting each cat.

Last evening, a friend and I played with Theo in my study. Then I snuggled with Koa. Then I went to start the night with Theo. When I made the mistake of looking over my shoulder, I saw a distressed and deeply saddened Koa staring back. Theo was busy, so I came back to Koa for a little bit. Then back with Theo for a few hours.

Koa was delightedly blissfully happy when I returned to her around midnight. Got up a few times to see Theo (somewhat of a blur for me), and finally went back to Theo around day break. He was happy for some company. And finally back to Koa for a few minutes.

I'll do what I call my "farm chores", then take out the garbage, play with both kitties a little more, and head off to work.

I'm sure we'll get the pattern down and I'll get a little more sleep while still sleeping split shifts. Meanwhile, I'm thinking about how to put screen windows in the hallway barrier. That sounds like the logical next step.

upper body -- so far not much to be concerned about

I spent two and a half hours at the mammogram place today. Most of that was waiting between the time they took film set one and set two. There was much squishing and reddened flesh and holding my breath. In the end, it sounds like I have "calcium deposits" which need to be followed every six months for the next two years. Sounds fairly routine.

However, between the time I was called back and the time I went in, I discovered not just one lump, but two. So I'm going back on Friday afternoon for an ultrasound.

I will admit that I've been a little -er- distracted the last few days, but I will also admit that what they're looking for isn't the most terrifying of all things I can think of. And those other things are only terrifying because they would shorten the good times that I'm finally having.

I'm assuming that on Friday, they'll say "thanks for coming; we'll see you in six months for your next mammogram" and that I'll then go on to have a nice weekend.

Thanks for all the good thoughts you've sent my way, both expressed and silent; much appreciated.

this is how it starts...

and let's hope it's how it ends, too. The phone call you don't want to get the day after your annual mammogram -- "Would you please call us back at the Breast Health Center?" Sure. Whatever. I now have an appointment on Tuesday for "more films". I take comfort in the fact that they're interested in both breasts, because none of my friends have had problems on both sides at once. I'll have more pictures taken, but it sounds even more uncomfortable than this week's episode; I'm still expecting to see a bruise erupt from my adventures a few days ago.

And onward, westward. Off to the mountains, for music and dance and some B&Bing. Back early next week.

islands of normalcy

From the beginning, Koa has had what I call islands of normalcy. She started with minute glimpses into the possibilities of being a normal cat. For example, when we'd climb up to the bathroom counter to visit her on her shelf, she'd sometimes rub our hand or accept a snack offering from us.

Now she hasn't visited her shelf for a long time, and I don't think she's been hanging out in the closet much, except for when the vacuum cleaner lady comes (the horror).

Her safe spot is now under the bed. And her islands are growing. She will usually get on the bed on command, and once there, she loves to be petted, scratched, and brushed. She purrs easily. She'll snuggle up to my stomach sometimes, and she is finally realizing that she is entitled to sleep on the bed.

With her growing comfort, she's developing quite a vocabulary. Originally, she squeaked out a tiny mew. That word is still in her repertoire, but she also chirrups and browts and speaks several tones of meow. One of my favorites is a little squeal of joy that I'm occasionally privileged to hear.

Another of her islands is downstairs. She'll often just hang around while we're having dinner. She'll walk from open door to open door and supervise whatever's going on outside. And lately, she's been lying under the rocking chair or on top of the stereo cabinet while we sit across the room from her in our chairs. She's even been playing downstairs a bit and nibbles on cat crunchies. Very occasionally, she'll consent to be petted downstairs, though more often by Robert than by me.

She hates coming in the upstairs bathroom when I'm in there. Recently, she's been peeking in at me. And last night, while I was brushing my teeth, she came in to use the litter box.

I'm so delighted with each little victory, and I am eager for each island to continue to grow.

continuation of the cat saga, performances in-house and out, and job progress

Another heat wave, sticky and schvitzy. The cats seem fine with it.

Life with cats continues. We let Koa in to see Theo one morning when Theo was on the little staircase leading to the bed. They lasted a good ten seconds before the hissing started and Koa struck Theo (claws sheathed, of course). We were all shaken.

The barrier is up and separates humans and cats. We have a lot of air holes at the top, but constructed so that Koa can't use them as a toehold to get over to the other side. She loves staring at Theo, and Theo has started to sit in the hallway where he can be seen.

For three nights in a row, we also brought Theo into the study to play, and shut the French doors leading to the bedroom. Last night, Koa watched for a long time, then consented to play with me, and finally jumped onto the bed and allowed me to pet her.

Some nights, we bring Theo downstairs. We give Koa her dinner upstairs and close her in her apartment, then play with Theo for a while so he has some time with us. Then I often come upstairs to be near Koa before bed.

Theo peed in the bed three times, all around 6 or 6:3o in the morning. So now, we start the night sleeping in our respective beds with our respective cats. Around 4:30 or 5, I wake up and go get Theo. Robert puts Theo in the bathroom (with handy one-stop shopping, including litter box, food, water, toys, and fun fun bathtub), and then comes to visit Koa and me. It's odd, but it's working, and the bed has remained pee-free.

We feel that there's progress on all fronts, but it's slow. Robert will be away next week, which should be interesting. I'm wondering if I'll end up doing split shifts in two beds so each cat gets some time with me. I'll be at work only three of the days he'll be gone, which will help a lot.

Oh, and Theo had his second visit to the vet today. He's gained a whole pound, so that he now weighs what Juliet did when she died. And he's still a baby. I think we'll have a big solid kitty on our hands when he gets older.

In other news, we've gone to all four performances of the summer dance series in Concord. Three of the performances were by professional dancers, and the last by a group of student dancers, led by student choreographers. I love the informal format and the exciting dance we get to see. I love that it all happens less than 15 minutes from home.

We also saw a stunning performance of The Crucible at the Vokes Theater, where I've had a subscription for nearly twenty years. I'd been dreading going, and I'm so glad we did. It was one of those experiences where it's hard to imagine any other actors in the lead role, the fit was so perfect, and I had to wonder whether W read the play some time in the distant past.

This weekend, we're headed to the Berkshires for three performances at Tanglewood and a dance performance at Jacob's Pillow. I'm looking forward to being there. And we'll go back two weeks later for another long weekend.

Uncle Cen will stay with Koa and Theo will go stay at the Cat Cottage with Auntie Chanda and Auntie DeDe.


And on the job front, a few weeks ago, Robert had an interview with one of the more reputable head hunters in the area. She was quite encouraging and suggested that he "geek up" his resume. So he added lots of acronyms, and suddenly the phone calls started coming in. He had an impromptu head hunter interview today, and he has two phone interviews tomorrow. This is great progress.